Tetsuo consumed me today. Woke up this morning, read three essays, and tried to put together a roadmap for talking about a film that is completely and totally schitzophrenic. Imagine three hours of me trying to get the rest of the class to talk about a film that, I think, renders people speechless. And some of it was fun, but some of it was truly painful. We were treated to lecture #5 - the one where your professor says "you need to not only do the work, but come to class excited and ready to talk" ... a talk WE SHOULD NOT be getting in a graduate class... it's just pathetic. The reason why I say pathetic is that it's NOT me. I can talk about anything for hours on end, and I love love love this class. And I love love love this film - we didn't even make it halfway through the movie because I had so much to talk about with them and I wanted to be careful about what I was doing.
Being in front of the "crowd" of five other students today, I realized how hard our prof has had to work each week. She's pulling teeth to get people to actually talk. They're grad students who don't seem to have opinions. It's ... WEIRD. But she thanked me profusely for my presentation, so hey, I'm doing brilliantly right now. And she brought a book in on the film that I hadn't seen, and she basically told me that's what I'm doing my work for the semester on (and part of me is like "NOOOOOO I don't want to be assulted by the film again!" and the other part is like "YAY! I SO CAN TALK ABOUT THIS FILM" so ... it'll work out, it will). It was thrilling and lovely and brilliant and part of me didn't want to leave the room at the end.
Then we watched a 2-hour movie called Kaidan. And now I'm (thankfully) back home.