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05 September 2012 @ 03:30 am
Konbanwa - adventures are adventurous  
Wow, ok. I had this whole post in my head, I've been writing it for days. But let me get this evening's crap out of the way:

I really don't like closing all the windows and throwing the air conditioner on. Really don't like it. Sometimes feel like I'm suffocating when I'm in a tiny house with things closed up like that. Housemate wants to keep the air con on all the time when she is at home - windows closed, everything buttoned up, also *expensive*. I tried talking with her about it tonight and her solution to the problem is that I can hang out on the porch and in my room. And we can turn the air conditioner off when she goes to bed or when she's not at home.

And if I want something else she's going to move out. She's contemplating moving out right now because I tried to talk to her about this and come to a compromise that wasn't the above. Admittedly my suggestions all involved that we would open the windows sometimes. I may be totally fucked if she moves out.

I am totally fucked. She's already annoyed at living with me, and we've been here a week. I shouldn't have gone out of my room this week apparently. And I can't talk to her about not moving out because she's already indicated that I spent too long talking about the air conditioning situation and that she's at the end of her patience.

Ok, so that aside, it's been kind of cool being back in Japan. I have all these other things that I wanted to write about - spending a night on the streets of Yokohama the first night I got in (seriously hilarious), walking around my neighborhood, what my apartment is like, how I'm freaking out a little bit about the level my Japanese is because there are a bunch of students whose verbal vocabulary is awesome, how cool it is to come back to a place that I know a little bit about, how everyone here has a dog and they don't seem to mind if I pet them. How my Mom is a champ for taking care of my dog and how issues have already cropped up with Domino and how I'm a little worried about that. How leaving LA made me reflective in a good way about this journey that I'm on. But I'm going to save those for another night because I'm managing to freak myself out right now about the whole apartment mate thing.

wish me luck kids, wish me luck.

also posted to dreamwidth | you can reply here or there | um, but don't worry, i'm still an lj girl
seldomifeverseldomifever on September 5th, 2012 11:35 am (UTC)
My husband and I have the same ac arguments, but he's never threatened to move out over them. So sorry you have to deal with this so soon into your trip. *hugs* And yay! You're in Japan!!
my monkied brain: _nihon-flowerkatekat1010 on September 6th, 2012 05:18 am (UTC)
I used to a bit with my ex, too, but we always managed to come to a compromise that wasn't about exiling each other to separate rooms. I had a feeling this year might be difficult and I just hope she won't react this way every time I try to bring something up to get her way.

but yes, I'm in Japan!!! Other than it that it's kind of ridiculously cool!
brutti_ma_buoni: autumnbrutti_ma_buoni on September 5th, 2012 01:39 pm (UTC)
Eeesh. Hope it's just moving-in stress and things become calmer, and airier, before too long.

my monkied brain: _nihon-flowerkatekat1010 on September 6th, 2012 05:19 am (UTC)
thanks darling - hopefully it's the initial friction and it'll get better. send me all your fresh air thoughts that you can :D *hugs*
Muriellemurielle on September 5th, 2012 03:54 pm (UTC)
Sounds like your room mate might be a bit of a bully/immature. Either/or positions don't allow for much growth and definitely shut the other person out of the conversation, don't they?

My personal experience with people who start out by setting a lot of boundaries is that they tend to be intolerant of others' boundaries and needs.

Try not to stress about it. Play it by ear for a while, see how things develop, but maybe over the next few weeks keep a look out for someone who might be better suited to your needs in a room mate.
my monkied brain: _nihon-flowerkatekat1010 on September 6th, 2012 05:21 am (UTC)
Sadly the immature part is pretty confirmed - and yes, they really do. I also think I terrified her by actually saying "hey, can we talk about this instead of snapping at each other about it"?

If I could get into a different contract I probably would consider it, but I kind of signed away my rights to move to get this place because it's facilitated by our program. We'll see - it may be that I simply get really used to my room. I like solitude.
Muriellemurielle on September 6th, 2012 12:48 pm (UTC)
You have a great attitude. That will see you through anything you have to deal with for sure. ;-)
darkdreams1222dreamsofspike on September 6th, 2012 02:58 am (UTC)
Hmmm... it seems like she's pretty self-centered to not be able to listen to your side any more than she's willing to :/ TBH, I don't think I could handle living without AC on all the time, because I get overheated easy and miserably uncomfortable (and it'd be worse when sleeping than at any other time! lol) but when you're living with someone else you have to think about their comfort too...

It sounds like pushing it right now might not be a good idea, but I think I'd want to suggest that if that's her plan, she pay a larger portion of the electric bill :/ If it was up to you, said bill wouldn't be as high as it's clearly going to be, so why should you have to pay so much of it?
my monkied brain: WC_neal hatkatekat1010 on September 6th, 2012 05:25 am (UTC)
it's not that i want her to be uncomfortable when she sleeps - but that's the sort of 'good' in the situation - that we both have what amounts to high powered window units in our rooms that are separate from each other (so she could run hers with the door closed and i could do the same, or not). I certainly wouldn't take that away from her! I just wanted to negotiate something for the common areas that didn't end up being 'all windows closed all the time' so i could have my bedroom door open sometimes too.

But yeah, I think you're right, I'm not going to push it anymore since basically we're at an impasse. I am worried about how much the electric bill is going to be, but guess I'll see what happens when it comes, you know?

thanks for the advice sweetie!