my monkied brain (katekat1010) wrote,
my monkied brain
katekat1010

No means ... go away.

There's always one. Always. One person in my class who, no matter how nice they are or how gentle of spirit, always set my teeth on edge. Usually it has nothing to do with appearance or age or anything like that - just a personality or occasinally a tone of voice. Whatever it is, I end up feeling as if they're dragging their nails across the chalkboard everytime they open their mouths to speak.

It's not really an active thing though - just a niggling feeling that sits at the back of my brain.

I make a conscious effort not to act like it. Just because they drive me up the wall doesn't mean they aren't probably deeply interesting people. Or, even if they're not, at least they're capable of being hurt and I'm not trying to belittle them. So I hate them from the privacy of my own mind, and put up that happy polite front.

That polite front does not, however, extend to wanting to be their friends. Dear god no.

So when the guy who drove me nuts in the last class every time he opened his mouth decided he wanted to walk me back to my car this week, my brain about melted down. "I don't understand?!" I wanted to yell, "Why don't you leave me alone? I don't talk to you in class, I respond when you say hello, but I don't make an effort to become your friend. I practice with you when I have to, but I could care less about your financial problems with the university, your case of pink eye (EWE), or your issues with physical rehabilitation. Go AWAY."

And yet... somehow I didn't say any of those things. I was as rude as I could be, yet somehow not rude enough.

The crowning glory of all of this unwanted attention? Two days ago he asked me if I'd drive him to the grocery store sometime.

I'm not even sure if the guy knows my first name. And he wants me to be his chauffeur. Finally, though, it was something I could say no to. And so I did. In the firmest NO I could muster.

If he tries this whole friendship approach again, however, I may be forced to run before I say something even I won't like.
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